in Mind, Mindfulness
The Buddha Pill
Does meditation really have the power to change us?
Positivity is an attitude. Happiness comes as a result of that attitude. Much like a muscle, it is a discipline and something you have to work on.
Jake Ballentine
Choosing what to focus on is the biggest choice that you can make
We have the ability to choose what we consume, and what we decide to focus on. In his book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’, the psychologist Victor Frankel cites Dostoevsky in his mention of man’s “inner freedom”. As an inmate of an Auschwitz concentration camp in World War II, the psychologist wrote that every individual has the fundamental authority to decide if he will be moulded by circumstance, or to “decide what shall become of him – mentally and spiritually”.
Positivity is not denying the existence of problems, or adversity. It is about finding the good in the wrong, and knowing you can do something about it. An event, plus your response, equals your outcome. Let’s just say you don’t have control over an event, you always have a hundred percent control over your response. With everything that happens in your life, you have either somehow contributed to it, or you have control over what you’re going to do about it.
Positivity is not thinking everything is great all the time
Positivity is not thinking everything is great all the time. It’s about focusing on what you can do, as opposed to what you can’t. I had a major change in my life when I realised I wasn’t taking responsibility for myself. I was 270 pounds and my wife and I were struggling to have children. For so long, I felt it was unfair that I was having these problems and I just blamed everything. Everything outside of me was the problem. Then I started getting into personal development. Specifically, Jack Hanfield and Tony Robbins’s work. Jack talks about taking 100% responsibility for everything in your life. When I started taking responsibility, I saw my trial as a good thing and actually, my biggest blessing. The thing that I thought was unfair that was happening to me, was actually happening for me.
Positivity is an attitude. Happiness is its result
I think that positivity is the most practical advice you can give anyone for their success. It is a discipline and something you have to work on, much like a muscle. In my work, I have spoken to many inspirational people who have overcome adversity. From Sean Stephenson, Diamond Dallas Page to the oldest rookie in Major League Baseball. The one thing I noticed that they all had in common, was they didn’t take no for an answer. The people who are successful have an indefatigable attitude and refuse to be defeated no matter how hard it gets. When asked how he stays so positive, Diamond Dallas Page responded, “I stay so positive because I work at it”. I asked Sean Stevenson the same and he replied, “I’ve tried the other and I’m unhappy, unsuccessful and not a good person to be around. When I flip that around and choose to focus on the positive, that’s when life is good. That’s when I’m happy, and that’s when I offer value to the world”.
All the people who are truly inspiring have experienced trials and heartaches, they were just willing to keep going no matter what. It’s ok if a moment or situation makes you feel frustrated. But when you become a victim, it does nothing but harm for you. I think positivity and happiness is a choice, and only you can decide what to focus on.
